Cleanin’ Up

The Brother has returned home or possibly he is returning home today or something. At any rate, he is gone, and there’s something so … refreshing and relaxing about the time right after a guest leaves or you return from a vacation when you’re getting back into your usual routine and cleaning up from all the fun you had. Also, the clean up process is kind of eye opening. It’s always like “WHAT? What just happened here?! HOW IS IT THIS MESSY?!” Like yesterday when I was doing the dishes from the weekend. Actually, no, they were just the dishes from Sunday because I ALSO did dishes Sunday morning before breakfast. And HOLY CRAP. We only had ONE extra person in the house! How did we use enough dishes for ten?! And I’m exaggerating, obviously, but ONLY A LITTLE. Sunday morning I washed AT LEAST four coffee cups, only one of which I used, and which was then immediately dirtied again in the name of omelets, and yesterday? I washed SIX MORE. SIX. How do you even use SIX coffee cups in 24 hours?! And I’m not counting any mugs I may or may not have used for ice cream and/or wine. AHEM.

And OH THE BEER. Feller and I finished off the last of 54 bottles of beer last night. FIFTY FOUR BOTTLES OF BEER. Between three people! And OKAY FINE, to be fair, Feller and I did most of the drinking. Work’s been stressful, yo! And REALLY, that’s not THAT much beer over three evenings. Not even CLOSE to what I used to drink on a fairly regular basis. Like that one time my heart was completely SHATTERED, and I drank a 12 pack then went out and had a few gin and tonics. That was fun. By which I mean HORRIBLE. That was one of the worst hangovers I’ve EVER had, and I had to work with the breaker of my heart the next day, AND he had the audacity to LAUGH at my misery. I was *this close* to shanking the bitch. Also, and I am only SORT OF ashamed to admit this, but I just did a quick Facebook stalk, and he is married to the girl he chose instead of me, so, you know, good for him! BUT I’m in the hotter couple. I won THAT breakup!

Keepin’ Busy

SO. The Brother is here, and he’s NOT horrible! He’s actually quite pleasant! I haven’t really had much of a chance to hang out with him, thanks to work, jet lag, ski trip preparations and the ski trip itself. I am now looking forward to having him around the house a bit next week and getting to know Feller’s family.

SPEAKING of the ski trip, Feller’s gone all weekend. ALL WEEKEND. I can’t even tell you the last time I slept alone, but it’s been AT LEAST since October, if not before then. And I know that’s not really a long time, but it feels like it’s been ages. And Mandatory Relationship Cuddles make the time apart a little unbearable. I’ve gotten so used to falling asleep RIGHT NEXT to him that having the entire bed to myself is just bizarre. I slept in the very center of the bed last night in an attempt to take up as much space as possible, but there’s still a lot of bed left over.

AND now I’m faced with the dilemma of what in the HELL do I do with myself without him around? We’ve been dating less than a year, but I ALMOST can’t remember how I even kept myself entertained alone. What did I do with all that free time? I HAVE NO IDEA. I guess I’ll just watch a lot of Netflix? I suppose? It’s times like this I wish I were still getting three discs from Netflix; I’d have a whole Big Love marathon.

Really though, tomorrow I’m having myself a double feature matinee of movies I probably wouldn’t have been able to get Feller to see and going to a party with friends of ours in the city. Sunday, I’ll check out a new church (driving an hour into the city every week just WAS NOT happening), and maybe I’ll get crazy and do my taxes! Whoo! Party time! Excellent!

This weekend and next, when the boys will be going up to Tahoe again, are just practice for April. We’re going to South Africa together, but thanks to my job’s shitty vacation policy, I’ll be coming home two-three weeks before him. THAT’S gonna suck. And I cannot even begin to tell you how tempting it is to just quit and travel with him for a month. I’d find a job when I got back! No problem! SIGH. I hate reality.

I Might Get Nekkid. Sorry About That.

SO my feller’s brother lands in San Francisco tomorrow afternoon, and INTERNET, I’m nervous. This will be the first time meeting any of his family (though I have skyped with his parents a couple of times, and they’re lovely), and I’ve got a bit of a worry knot in my tummy. I mean, what if he hates me?! What if I hate him?! He can’t hate me! I’m likeable, DAMMIT! That’s just the way it is, people like me (except when they don’t, but that’s usually a flaw in their personality and has nothing to do with me). I’m funny (at least according to my mom and grandma)! And adorable! And … other things people like. At any rate, I’m well equipped to deal with the feller’s brother, BUT! BUT! BUT!

And I think the biggest issue for me is that I really don’t know what to expect. I don’t know much about the brother or how long he’ll actually be staying at our house as he plans on doing a lot of skiing in Tahoe while he’s here or how the jet lag will affect him and what hours he’ll keep while he’s here. I mean, will he be up at the crack of dawn? Will he be hanging out with into the wee hours of the morning with my man? Are we entertaining him while he’s here? How will I prevent accidental nekkidness? This is a real concern for me! I’m not so good with the wearing of clothes at home, especially not when I’m used to not having to worry about other people being exposed to my nekkidness. Or even when there are other people around! Like that one time my roommate wasn’t at work like she was supposed to be, and I stumbled into the kitchen TOTALLY BUTT NEKKID to feed the cats. Or when I would forget to close the bathroom door before starting to pee, and then I’d look up and she’d be staring at me from her bed (this happened an embarrassing number of times). I mean, let’s face it, he’s gonna see me in my bra, that’s a given, anyone who’s ever lived/stayed/been around me at home knows that AT SOME POINT, I will wander around the house topless, but I’m really going to have to focus on remembering to put clothes on before leaving my bedroom.

And LET ME JUST SAY, it’s a Good Thing he’s coming in January when it’s too damn cold for me to be anything less than fully clothed until bedtime. If he were visiting in June/July/August, all bets would be off.

Happy Holidays

So, quickly, check out my 2010 Book List! Eventually, I’ll get down to doing a Top Five of 2010, but it might be a couple of weeks. You know how I am about follow through.

ANYWAYS. The feller and I went home for Christmas and New Year’s. Well, my home. Arizona. We stayed a few days with my mom, until we decided that we needed some Grown Up Time and got a motel, which was AWESOME. OMG. Awesome. And then we were down in Tucson for about 5 days staying with my BFF and her hubby. And, fuck. It was SO NICE. We didn’t have a plan or an agenda or shit that we had to do. No wedding dress shopping or bridal showers or weddings or birthdays or preplanned bbq’s. All those things were fun, and I enjoyed doing them, but there’s something to be said for the freedom to chill and hang and do whatever you feel like doing.

We had dinner with friends and played with fireworks (they’re legal in AZ now!) (except bottle rockets; you still can’t have those) (how long before someone burns down his neighborhood, I wonder?) and made Christmas candy with Mariam and I got a new tattoo and we went shopping and drinking and just had a relaxing good time. It was EXACTLY what I was hoping for on this trip, and even though it wasn’t how my feller wanted to spend his Christmas break, he was wonderful and went along with everything I suggested.

The only bad thing is that I’m homesick like crazy now (though I suppose I will admit that the INTENSITY of my feelings are in part due to menstrual hormones). If I weren’t in a happy, loving and committed relationship, I’d pack up my stuff tomorrow and go home. And it’s not even that I don’t LIKE the Bay Area; I like it FINE, but it’s not my home. It’s not where my support system, all the people I love, is, and I just don’t know if I could ever feel about here the way I feel about there. Because it’s about more than just the people and relationships that I have there that I don’t have here; I LOVE Tucson. I love the desert and the mountains and the heat and the summer storms, and, I don’t know, I feel at home there. I have since the first day I moved down there. But for now, I just hope and pray that my path leads me home someday.

ANYWAYS. Tucson was awesome. Family was awesome. Friends were awesome. And everyone really liked the feller. All in all, it was a successful trip. And we came home to find our house-sitter was a secret cleaning freak (or maybe not so secret; I don’t know her life), and she left us a list of the things she had cleaned, which basically was ALL THE THINGS. NO JOKE, she DUSTED OUR CEILING, y’all. I don’t think I’ve EVER dusted a ceiling in my LIFE. AND she thought my kitties were adorable! Even Bandito, who’s kind of a shithead! So that was a pleasant surprise at 3 am when we got home.

So, good trip, good holidays and now it’s back to the same old same old for now. But I do believe change is a comin’ this year. I’m ready, I am.